fight_my_fate | For themarblechief

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For themarblechief

Margaret has always been an early riser, and this morning was no exception. Soon after the early morning sun begins streaming through the window, she wakes, heart singing when she blinks her eyes open, noticing that Enjolras is still right beside her. Maybe she had the fleeting thought that the night before was just a dream. In sleep, he looks young and carefree - she's surprised that the difference between sleep and awake is so great.

She quietly slips from bed and makes her way quietly to clean herself up ... after all, she's a bit of a mess and very sore, although she doesn't regret a thing about the path that they've chosen to go down. So, nobody could know, maybe that was for the best.

If he wakes anytime soon, she will be nowhere to be seen.

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She almost protests at that, but then he continues, and she nods in agreement. "I thought it was all too clear that I did enjoy myself. Did you?"

She hums softly, leaning ever closer.

"I ... could eat. But I must admit, it will be difficult to keep a proper distance from you."

[ooc: Ah, one of these days I'll read it and break my own heart.

If I knew anything about fixing computers, I'd help, but I'm honestly so technologically inept, it's not funny.]

"I did. It was...oh, it was perfection."

He hasn't thought about that. They are a secret. They possibly will be forever.

"I will fetch us something so that we may eat in private. Will that suffice?"

Ooc: when Jehan died, I cried for like three hours. No exaggeration.

Neither am I. Oy vey.

"Do you think ... will every time be like that?"

Margaret remembers agreeing to keep this new facet to their relationship a secret, but the more she thinks about it, the more she begins to think that she'll have a hard time keeping away.

"If that's what you think is best."

[ooc: Awww, but I understand. You get emotionally attached.

I'll ... send good thoughts.]

"I think it will be better."

She looks so...sad, so pensive, and he looks at her curiously.

"What is wrong, my love?"

Ooc: it's true. My poor Prouvaire.

Thanks. I found a good one for 400. We'll see.

"Better, could it possibly get better?"

Ah. She was more transparent than she thought she was, then. She looks up, offering a small smile.

"I just ... I don't wish to hide what we are. It feels very much like lying, and shouldn't they all know that there are things to fight for, like love?"

[ooc: Now Anna and Riley and Georgia just want to hug him forever.

I'll keep my fingers crossed.]

"Of course. I will learn everything you enjoy, everything you desire."

It is true, he knows it is true. But still, he cannot help but be reluctant.

"I do not know, mon amour. Not now. It...it is not the right time."

"Well, then, we will have to learn that together, since I ... don't really know. All I know is that I want you."

She understands, of course, why they must hide. It doesn't mean that she has to be happy about it.

"I know. Believe me, I won't do anything to jeopardize your plans."

"We will do just that."

She's upset. It's clear she's upset. He doesn't know why he can't be open about them but he just can't.

"Margaret, do not be upset with me. I told you before we began that we could not love one another openly. It is too risky, too dangerous..."

"I'll look forward to learning, then."

The last thing she wants to do is to alienate him from her, or from the cause, and she knows that she has to swallow her pride and forget about being open and honest - at least until they're alone together.

"I know that. Believe me, I know, and I'm not asking you to do anything that you're not comfortable with. I'll be happy to be with you here, just you and I and no need to hide."

He's so disappointed in himself, lowering his eyes.

"This is why I said you should find another man. Someone who can proclaim his love from the hilltops and who can show you off around town. Me, I have no choice but to hide you. Someone as perfect as you should never be hidden."

He's quiet for a moment, pensive.

"Let us go to breakfast. Together. Come what may."

The very last thing Margaret wants to do is to upset Enjolras in any way - she's pushed him into new territory enough, and he's got more things to worry about, far more important things, than her feelings.

"Please, don't start that again. I don't need to be shown off - I just need to know that even when we can't touch or show it, you still want me to be yours. That's all."

She knows very well what the consequences might be, and yet -

"I will."

Yet if she asked, she would know that nothing could ever be more important than her feelings.

He nods at her words, kissing her gently. "I will always desire you for myself, Margaret. Always. And I am grateful that you feel the same about me."

Enjolras offers her a small bow before opening the door for her so that they may exit.

ooc: Sneaking onto my mom's computer because I'm already over this whole 'tagging on my phone' thing.

And modern!Enjolras is still not approved. COME ON, DUDE. HE'S EXACTLY THE SAME AS THIS MUSE. JUST LET HIM INNNN.

The thin white thread tied around her finger tells her so.

And she smiles into the kiss, although she wishes that it never has to end. They would need to eat, though, and she didn't bring much along with her so that they could stay here to do so. "I do. You drive me insane, but I do."

Before they leave, Margaret has to find a scarf to wrap around her neck - there are marks there that she can't hide. But she murmurs a soft 'thank you', and steps outside, waiting for him to walk at her side.

[ooc: Understandable. I have to walk to the bank again, ugh.

WHY ARE THEY SO SLOOOOOW?! Good thing is, Maggie hasn't gotten any tags (not sure why that's good), so she can wait.]

"You drive me mad as well, mon amour." And he laughs, kissing her nose. If this is affection, he doesn't understand it but he enjoys it all the same.

He waits patiently before walking at her side, hands clasped behind his back. He won't reach for her hand or even look her way but every so often, he will 'accidentally' bump his hip to hers. He's there. And he doesn't want her to forget that.

ooc: Boo. Well, I have to go back to work and I can't sneak the computer this time. More boo.

I DON'T KNOW. I have an idea for a Smutty thread too but NO. IT'S TAKING A LIFETIME. GAH.

Margaret doesn't particularly understand how frustration can turn into ... this, but she wasn't about to overthink things. When they're like this, there was nowhere else she wants to be. And when he laughs like that, she knows that she wants to do whatever she can to see it more.

It's so hard to be so close without reaching out to touch, but Margaret manages. Outside like this, they were allies, nothing more. To make a wrong move now, to make people wonder if he's devoted to the cause - it could bring everything down around them.

She doesn't smile whenever she's 'accidentally nudged, but instead will affect a bothered sigh. It's not much, but it's something.

[ooc: Aw, damn.

I KNOW, RIGHT. I'm generally a patient person, but that only extends so far.]

He glares at her, hiding the smile he feels inside. It's almost fun, this game. Acting as though he can't stand her presence when really, he thrives in it.

When they reach the cafe, he quickly steps in front of her to open the door, grunting when she walks right into his chest.

"Pardon, Mademoiselle."

Ooc: still nothing. Smutty, come on...

She could laugh, it is so ridiculously hard to keep up appearances that they are wary of each other, that they feel nothing - at least, not what they really feel, but she manages, even though at times her lips twitch in her attempts to keep from smiling.

Margaret huffs out a breath, muttering, "I can do it myself," before finally stepping inside, keeping ahead of him just a few steps.

[ooc: Waiting is the hardest part.]

He lets out a low growl, tempted to grab her by the crook of her arm and kiss her right there. But they must wait and they will.

"Order something, Woman, and order me something as well. We do not have all the time in the world."

She has much the same inclination, but doesn't - this sort of ... pent up want and need would all come to a head later, she's sure, when they're alone once more.

"It would do you well to have some manners. Go, go, and I'll fetch you your food like a good woman does."

And she's off to order another tray full of food, since she knows how hungry they both are, given their activities from the night before.

He cannot wait much longer. And when the food is done, he grabs Margaret's arm and pulls her upstairs to eat. Upstairs is Enjolras's workspace. They know not to disturb him there.

They need to eat but not before Enjolras puts the tray down, pushes her to the wall, and kisses her deeply.

"Insufferable woman."

With a quick breath, she's being pulled along, and she worries that someone will see. If someone sees, inevitably there will be talk, and he doesn't need that kind of rumor and innuendo.

In a whirlwind, the tray is down, she's being pushed against the wall with a grunt and groan and then - oh, and then, he's kissing her like he's a thirsty man and he's her oasis.

"Maddening man."

His lips move up and down her neck desperately as if he can't survive any longer without her.

"This is why every man fought for your hand, mon amour. Your fire, your ferocity...I do not wish to ever extinguish it. I do not wish to ever tame you."

As much as she wants to remind him of their agreement to hide this side of their relationship, she can't quite find the words to do so, not when he's so intent on kissing her like this.

"They lusted after my title and fortune. You see me in a different way - and if you think you could ever tame me, you are quite mistaken."

... No one notices footsteps as they fall on the stairs.

"I could never tame you and it is why I - "

"Why you what, Enjolras?"

The blonde man freezes, his breath catching in his throat. A quiet 'merde' escapes from his lips as he looks over his shoulder.

Grantaire.

"Leave, Grantaire. There is no use for you here."

"No, Monsieur, I think I might stay."

Margaret tries to hide, the voice cutting through the stillness, and interrupting whatever was to be said, but it's really no use, is it?

Just like Enjolras had feared, they had been caught.

She peeks at the other man, quiet, waiting on bated breath to hear what he would say next.

"So this is your revolution? Pretending to be a revolutionary merely to sleep with royal whores?"

"She is not a - "

But he stops talking because he notices the look on Grantaire's face then. Hopelessness. Shame.

"I thought you were the light, Enjolras. You are just as bleak as everyone else."

And when Grantaire leaves, Enjolras swallows heavily, moving to sit. He doesn't dare look at Margaret.

If she's offended by the accusation, Margaret doesn't show it, nor does she try to defend herself. Really, she's ashamed. She was here to help, supposedly, and yet, in one day, she's managed to alienate Enjolras from other men and that is ... it's inexcusable, isn't it?

He might move away from the wall, but she stays where she stands, as still as a statue.

"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. I should - I shouldn't be here. I should never have come."

"Don't. It was my fault. I knew better and yet, I - "

He shakes his head, pushing the tray away. He's no longer hungry.

"...leave the revolution, Margaret. Save yourself. Let me lead my men in the manner that I should."

He looks at his hands, miserable.

"No more distractions."

What could she say in return? Why fight when it's her very presence that has most likely ruined everything.

So this was what a broken heart felt like.

She doesn't say a word, pushing off from the wall, pausing as she considers laying a hand on his shoulder, apologizing once more, but she thinks that it might just make matters worse.

Instead, she quietly takes her leave, trying desperately not to dissolve into tears as she goes.

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